


Letters Home

by Once_More_With_Feeling



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Encouragement, Friendship, Leaving Home, Letters, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-04
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-11 03:00:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11705418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Once_More_With_Feeling/pseuds/Once_More_With_Feeling
Summary: The letters Thomas wrote and received while he was away as butler for Sir Mark and Lady Stiles. I'll add more relationship and character tags as I go.





	1. Chapter 1

20 September, 1925

 

Dear Mrs. Hughes,

 

Well, I've arrived safely in my new place, and I'm beginning to get settled. Please tell the others—if they are interested in hearing—that I'm here and I'm well.

 

Sir Mark and Lady Stiles aren't much for conversation, though that's to be expected. They seem fair employers, anyway, and though the estate is nothing compared to Downton, they've told me they don't mind a bit if I walk the grounds in my free time. The gardens are small but lovely, and I might take them up on it if I've the time.

 

It's funny, I didn’t expect to feel excited to be here, but I keep thinking that the slate is finally clean, as they say. I’m looking forward to my new life, and to meeting some new friends perhaps, like you said.

 

There are two other servants here besides me, and I hope to get on with them. There is the cook, Mrs. Jenkins, and don’t tell her I said so, but I know already that her cooking doesn’t hold a candle to Mrs. Patmore’s. Please do tell Mrs. P. I said so, though. There is also a day maid, but I haven’t met her yet; I shall put on my friendliest face when I do.

 

I do miss all of you at Downton, more than I thought I would. Do you think it would be alright if I wrote to Master George? Not sure what Lady Mary would make of that, though I do miss him, and the other children, and you, and Miss Baxter, and even the Bateses and Mr. Carson. I wish I had Andy and Daisy to talk to, as well. I shall try to make do with the gardens and a few books for company, for now.

 

I hope this letter finds you well, and everyone else, too. I hope Mr. Carson's not run off his feet with only one footman left in the house. I would love a letter from you if you have a moment, because I think often of you all, and wonder what you all are getting up to.

 

Sincerely,

Mr. Barrow

 

***

 

20 September, 1925

 

Phyllis,

 

I just dashed off a letter to Mrs. Hughes, but then thought I ought to write one to you as well. She’ll probably tell anyone who wants to hear it that I’ve arrived and started work (or start tomorrow, anyway), but I missed you all of a sudden, so thought I’d write, and just tell you about my new place.  

 

The estate is small, but really beautiful, though that might be owing to the time of year, it being not too hot, and not raining too terribly much yet. I've been told I can have run of the gardens if I want—in my free time, that is—and I'll probably take advantage, since I've not much else to do besides read. And work, of course.

 

There are two other servants here besides me; Mrs. Jenkins, who is the cook, and a day maid I haven’t met yet. The cook seems friendly enough, so maybe we’ll get on alright.

 

How are things with you? You must all be terribly busy, with reductions in staff and all. I hope Lady Grantham continues to be good to you, as you deserve it.

 

How is Mr. Molesley getting on at the school? Did he start teaching full time yet? I did mean it when I told him I hope he makes something of his life. He seems a bit timid to me, but if you like him I will endeavor to, also. I am trying to be nicer, when I've got the opportunity.

 

I know I’ve only just arrived, and I’m looking forward to all my new life has to offer. But I do find myself wishing to see a familiar face. Do you think you might visit sometime soon? The train ride wasn’t too terribly long, and I wouldn’t mind a cup of tea with you at all. Until then, take care of yourself, and know that I think often of you,

 

Thomas

 

***

 

23 September, 1925

 

Dearest Thomas,

 

It did my heart so good to have a letter from you! I saw you sent one to Mrs. Hughes as well, and I’m sure she feels the same about hearing from you. We do all miss you so.

 

We’ve all been kept busy, that’s for certain, which is why I’m just now sitting down to write to you, just before I go up to bed, though your letter arrived in the first post this morning. The family has got Lady Edith’s wedding to plan for, and so there’s a bit of extra work there. Don’t worry about Mr. Carson—he worries about staff constantly, but Mrs. Hughes keeps him in line.

 

You are such a dear to ask after Mr. Molesley. He has indeed started teaching full time, and moved to his cottage. He has a real life for himself in the village now, and I know he’s pleased. He is a wonderful teacher and I’m pleased for him, as well. And please know that you are not just trying to be nicer, Thomas—you are nice. I know very well that that’s true, and don’t you forget it.

 

I would love to visit you, and will do as soon as I can. I’m so glad that you’re not too far away, and we can still see each other sometimes. And her ladyship has told me that of course you’ll be invited to the wedding, since you’re still Lady Edith’s hero. We’ll see you then, if not before.

 

I’m so glad to hear you say that you’ve got things to look forward to. Maybe when I visit you can show me the gardens. And I’m sure that by the time I hear from you next, you and Mrs. Jenkins and the other staff there will be old friends.

 

Take care, dear one. Know that I miss you and think of you often as well,

 

Phyllis

 

***

 

27 September, 1925

 

Dear Mr. Barrow,

 

I thank you so much for your letter, and for letting us all know that you are well and settled. Of course everyone was glad to hear it when your letter arrived during breakfast the other day.

 

I didn’t waste any time telling Mrs. Patmore that her cooking is better than your Mrs. Jenkins’. Mrs. P. has heard of Mrs. Jenkins, and said she knew that already, but I could tell by the way she blushed that she was pleased to hear it anyway. I believe she said that she would have to send you some sweets to keep your spirits up…

 

I think it’s a fine idea to write to Master George. First off, he was down here yesterday, begging for a treat from Daisy and Mrs. P, and he looked very forlorn indeed, which I’m sure is a result of missing you. Also he’s beginning to learn his letters, so I think a note from you would be most helpful in that regard. You were so kind and patient teaching Andrew; I’m sure you’d be the same for the young master.

 

I have to say that Mr. Carson and the rest of us have been busier than usual, though not quite run off our feet. Sometimes I wish Mr. Carson had insisted you work out the rest of your notice, and not just because of what a help you were to him. I do miss you, Thomas, and I wish there had been some way you could have stayed with us. I am so glad to hear you say that you’re looking forward to your new life, though. And I’m sure you’ll have plenty of new friends soon enough. You are a brave, kind and bright young man—you’ve just got to show it. As Anna said, I know you can do it.

 

You take care of yourself, and keeping writing to us. I know I’m going to hear many more wonderful things from you.

 

With warm regards,

Mrs. Hughes


	2. Chapter 2

DEAR MR. BARROW

I MISS YOU AND I WANT YOU TO COME BACK. MARIGOLD IS MOVING AWAY TOO, AND NOW I AM SAD. YOU CAN COME AND VISIT, AND GIVE ME A PIGGY BACK. AND MAYBE SYBBIE TOO.

PLEASE COME SOON.

FROM,

GEORGE

 

***

 

5 October, 1925

My goodness, Master George,

I had thought to write to you as soon as I was settled, and you’ve beaten me to it. What a clever boy you are.

I am so sorry to hear that you are sad—and that Miss Marigold is moving away, too. Sometimes the people we love have to leave us, but that doesn’t mean that they are not our friends any more. You know that I am still your friend, wherever I am, and I know Miss Marigold will always be your friend, too.

I would love to come and visit you, Master George, and I hope you know that I would if I could get away for a moment. Butlers are very busy people, indeed. For now we will have to continue to write; and I must say, I am very impressed with the letter you wrote to me. Very well done!

Now, I’ve got to go and serve the tea. You write to me again very soon, and please ask Miss Sybbie to write also. I look forward to hearing from you both.

Your friend,

Mr. Barrow

 

***

 

8 October, 1925

Dear Phyllis,

Thank you for your kind words in your letter. I heard from Mrs. Hughes as well, and it sounds as though you all are keeping very busy, so I appreciate you taking the time to write.

I had a letter from Master George also, which lifted my spirits well enough. It must have taken Nanny ages to help him write it out. He says he misses me and wants me to come visit and give him a piggy back, and I do wish I could. There are no children here, of course, only Sir Mark and Lady Stiles, and the cook and the maid. I promise you I tried to be friendly when I met the other servants, but the truth is I think they want to keep to themselves, so I think I must keep to myself accordingly. It’s a lonely prospect, but I wonder if perhaps I’m just meant to be lonely, at least for now. What do you think?

Please know I’m not trying to be mopey, and I’m alright. I just have a lot of time to think now, and this is what’s come of it. I’ve read in the paper that F. Scott Fitzgerald has a new book coming out next month, and I’m excited to read it, and happy to know I shall actually have the time do so.

I hope you and everyone else at Downton are well. Give my regards to Mr. Molesley, and Mrs. Hughes, and all the rest.

Your friend as always,

Thomas

***

12 October, 1925

Thomas—

I’ve had a bit of good news, and couldn’t wait to share it with you. Her ladyship is making a trip your way for some shopping she wants to do—a particular dress maker she wants to see, I think—and I’m to go with her. At first I thought she wanted me to come along to help carry things and such, but she asked me specifically if I’d like to ride up just to see you. She intends to give me the afternoon to myself, so I can see your new place, and have tea with you!

Her trip is scheduled for the 20th of this month; can you make yourself free for tea that afternoon? We won’t leave the abbey until just after luncheon, so I think I’ll be to your place at about three o’clock. I am so excited by the prospect of seeing you again! Drop me a line to let me know it’s alright, and—hopefully—I shall see you in only a few days.

Fondly,

Phyllis

P.S. Oh dear, I’ve just received your last letter, and had written this already before I got it. I want to answer your question thoughtfully—about whether you’re meant to be alone, but can’t do it justice now. We’ll talk about it when I see you, alright? Until then, take care of yourself.

P.P.S. Of course Master George wrote to you; he misses you terribly. I’m sure it was worth every minute (or hour) that it took him to write it out, if he knows it brought a smile to your face.


	3. Chapter 3

13 October, 1925

Dear Mr. Barrow,

Here are some of those ginger biscuits you like, with extra icing, and some chocolate truffles—I do hope they survive the post and don’t land on your doorstep a mess of crumbs. I’d have sent a cake as well, but I can guarantee that would have been a disaster by the time it reached you. That will have to wait until you visit us, I suppose. You were too thin when you left us, if I may say it, and I know that Mrs. Jenkins can’t satisfy your sweet tooth like I can. When you visit us, you just tell me what pudding you want, and I’ll make it up special for you—one for you and one for the rest of us if I have to.

Mrs. Hughes and Miss Baxter tell me they’ve heard from you a time or two, and that you’re doing well in your new job, which isn’t any kind of surprise. You always were flawless in your work, and when I think back on where you were not half a year ago, then think on how far you’ve come now, why I’m so proud of you I feel like crying out. Mrs. Hughes tells me she feels the same way, and though he doesn’t say it, I know Mr. Carson thinks it, too. You are the butler in a fine house, and you’ve earned it, Mr. Barrow. So I do hope that you are proud of you, too.

Enjoy the sweeties while they last, and when you want more, you just write and tell me. Now I’ve got to go and chase Andy out of this kitchen; the way that boy follows Daisy around, my goodness…

Take care of yourself, and remember, you can never have too many sweets.

Yours sincerely,

Mrs. Patmore

***

16 October, 1925

Dear Mrs. Patmore,

Heavens, you are trying to fatten me up, and no mistake. At least you come by it honestly. I will be sure to savor every sweet you sent (which survived the post well enough) and I thank you for them, truly.

I suppose the upside of there being no one here to get on with is that I get all of your sweets to myself. Though, honestly, even if Mrs. Jenkins and I were chummy, I would probably hide them from her, anyway. We wouldn’t want the old girl to compare her work to yours, and start doubting herself.

Thank you also for your kind words of encouragement. I shall try to be proud of myself if you say I should. I am looking forward to visiting all of you when I can, and not just for your cake (though if I’m being honest, that’s certainly one of the perks).

Sincerely,

Mr. Barrow

***

17 October, 1925

Dear Mr. Barrow,

Here are some lemon bon bons that I know you’ll like. Mrs. Patmore told me they’d not survive the post, but I don’t see how it matters. If they arrive a mess you can always eat them with a spoon. Anyway, I do hope you enjoy them, because I agree with Mrs. P. that you have gotten too thin these last months.

Miss Baxter and Mrs. Hughes tell us that you’re settled in your new place, but that you don’t like it very much. I’m sorry to hear it; it sounds lonely. Miss Baxter is quite excited to get to visit you in a few days, though, and I’m sure she’ll let us know how you’re faring. Mrs. Patmore and I will send a cake with Miss B; I wonder if she or this letter will get to you first.

I went to the farm the other day to see Mr. Mason, and Andy was there. Andy follows me about, and asks me to go out walking with him, and I can’t figure out why. Mrs. Patmore says he’s sweet on me of course, but that can’t be it, can it? When I saw him at the farm—he was up on a ladder, replacing some shingles for Mr. Mason—he suddenly looked so good to me… I don’t mean that how you think. He weren’t wearing a proper shirt at the time, but that wasn’t it. He just looked so young, and strong, and kind, I suppose. He doesn’t owe my Mr. Mason a thing, and there he was, mending the roof. What would a good young man like that want with me?

Anyway, I don’t know why I’m asking you, except that whenever I used to ask you something serious, you would usually give me a serious answer. Maybe you can think about it, and tell me what it means.

I’ve got to dash off now—dinner preparations to make. I hope you make some new friends in your new place, Mr. Barrow. You deserve that, at least. Write to us when you have the time.

Your friend,

Daisy

***

20 October, 1925

Dear Daisy,

Miss Baxter is coming to visit this afternoon, and your letter—and what was left of your lemon bon bons—arrived in the early post. Thought I’d settle the matter now, and let you know that your package arrived before Miss B. It doesn’t hurt to know that she’ll be arriving with cake, though I think if you and Mrs. Patmore had worried half as much about my skinny waistline when I worked there as you do now, I’d have ended up looking like one of Lady Mary’s pigs.

As for slightly more important matters, I’ve thought about what you asked about Andy, and I didn’t have to think very long. The reason a good, strong, kind young man wants to spend time with you is that you are good, and strong, and kind yourself—not to mention interesting, bold, and smart as a whip. Of course he wants to spend his time with you, Daisy. He’d be crazy not to. And whether he’s trying to court you or not, I would recommend you take friendship when it’s offered, as it doesn’t seem to me that it’s going to come round again in ten minutes time. That’s what I think. I hope that answer is serious enough for you.

Oh, and don’t worry about me not liking my place. I wouldn’t say that’s true, exactly. There just aren’t many people here to get on with. Maybe that’ll be alright, though. I keep expecting to feel lonely, and then oddly enough, I don’t. Or maybe I’m just happy to know I’ll have a visitor today. I shall have to let you know.

You take care of yourself, and don’t let Mrs. Patmore run you off your feet. Thank you for the bon bons. I shall take your advice and eat them with a spoon. And thank you in advance for the cake.

Your cheeky beggar,

Thomas


	4. Chapter 4

1 November, 1925

Dear Thomas,

How have you been since I last saw you? Mr. Molesley asked me this morning if I’d heard from you lately, and I realized I hadn’t since we met for tea. As I said when I saw you, you are looking very well, and I know you’re working hard to stay strong in your new resolution. But if I’m being honest, it worries me when I don’t hear from you. I do hope that you are well, and still enjoying your new place.

I’m so glad you showed me your gardens when I was there. They are lovely, even this time of year. I can see what you meant when you said they are a good place to sit and think. I do hope you’re enjoying the opportunity, only don’t spend every minute alone if you can help it, dear one. It’s alright if you’re not friendly with Mrs. Jenkins or Elsie; I’m sure there are other people about that you can make a connection with, if you try. And remember you still have all of us, even if we don’t see you every day any more.

Know that I think of you often, and I can’t wait to see you again,

Phyllis

***

8 November, 1925

Dear Phyllis,

I’m sorry it’s been so long since I’ve written. I didn’t intend to ignore you, or worry you, though. The truth is, it was so lovely to see you, and after you left I felt rather sad, for a few days at least. Your presence here—followed so quickly by your absence—made me take more notice of the quiet. Now I think that may be the biggest difference between Downton and my new place; not its smaller size, or how few other people there are, but the immense quiet that seems to be with me all the time.

At first I expected the quiet to make me feel sadder still, because at Downton, sometimes when I would go outside to smoke, the quiet seemed so heavy I thought it might crush me. This is different though. This just feels like a giant space where I can be myself, and not have to worry. I really have no one to impress, or hide from, and it feels so… easy. Strange how I feel less lonely now that there are so few people around. Maybe I’m just getting soft in my old age, but I find myself looking forward to the afternoons, when I can go outside and notice small things, and think my own thoughts in all this noiseless beauty.

You are a dear to worry for me, but you really needn’t. I can’t see the future; I don’t know if working here will always be the right thing—just as working at Downton was right for me sometimes and not at others—but being here is the right thing for now. I am enjoying the quiet, and the time I have to think. I believe I am finally beginning to understand what it means to have peace.

Now just because I’ve gone and found a way to finally enjoy some solitude doesn’t mean I don’t want to hear from you. Please continue to write, and do visit me again if you can. I will always answer your letters, and I’m quite sure I will always be willing to share my quiet space with you. You are the truest friend I have ever known, and I do hope that one day I can repay at least a fraction of the kindness you have shown me.

Until then, know that I remain,

Gratefully yours,

Thomas

***

12 November, 1925

Oh, Thomas—

I can’t tell you how much your last letter made me cry. I had to get up from the breakfast table and excuse myself to the courtyard for a moment, when I first opened it, but never mind that. I am just so happy to know that you’ve finally found some peace. Please know you deserve it. I wish you all the peace and quiet in the world, if it’s what you need. I wish you whatever you need.

My thoughts are with you now, more than ever.

Your friend always,

Phyllis


	5. Chapter 5

_The Right Honorable Earl and Countess of Grantham_

_Cordially invite you to the marriage of their daughter,_

_The Lady Edith Violet Crawley_

_To_

_The Most Honorable Marquis of Hexham_

_His Lordship Albert Anthony Pelham_

_At Five o’clock in the evening_

_Thursday, the 31st of December, 1925_

_Church of England_

_Downton Village_

_Reception and New Years Eve gala to follow at Downton Abbey,_

_Home of the Earl and Countess of Grantham_

 

***

20 November, 1925

Dear Lord Grantham,

I thank you very much for the invitation to Lady Edith’s wedding. I feel truly honored to be invited, not being a servant in your house any longer.

I shall be there if I am able to get away; there are only two other servants here besides me, and there wouldn’t be anyone to fill in for me if I were away. Please tell Lady Grantham that I do intend to find a way to be there, if at all possible.

Thank you again for your kind invitation, and do please give my best wishes to Lady Edith and Lord Hexham.

Yours sincerely,

Barrow

***

21 November, 1925

Dear Mrs. Hughes,

I’ve received the invitation to Lady Edith’s wedding, and written to his lordship and told him I will be there if at all possible. I do hope to be there, though I’m not sure I can get away. I spoke to Lady Stiles about it this morning, and she said she would think on it.

If I’m able to attend, might I have a room in the men’s attic for the night? The wedding is rather late in the day, and I’m not sure I’d be able to get a train back, after the reception.

If you could think on it, and let me know, I would appreciate it very much. I would very much like to attend the wedding, and see all of you again.

Sincerely,

Mr. Barrow

***

27 November, 1925

Thomas—

You silly boy, of course you may have a room here on the night of the wedding. As long as I am in charge, you will always have a place here. All you have to do is show your face on our doorstep, and we’ll have you. And don’t you forget it. 

No one has moved into your old room since you left; will that be alright for you, or would you prefer to sleep somewhere else?

I’m sure your Lady Stiles can live without you for a night or two, so please do find a way to be here. We all miss you so.

XOXO,

Mrs. Hughes

***

Mr. Barrow,

Granny says you are coming to Auntie’s wedding, and that means you can give me a piggyback—I don’t care what Georgie says. And anyway, you should give me one because I have been mostly good while you have been away.

Love,

Sybbie

***

1 December, 1925

Dear Miss Sybbie,

I am pleased to hear that you have been (mostly) good while I’ve been gone, though of course I knew you would be. And I will be happy to give you a piggyback any time I am able to visit. I still am not sure if I can get away for the wedding, but I will do my best. I do so hope to see you, Master George, and Miss Marigold again, and play with you.

You’ve done a fine job of writing to me—what a clever young lady you are growing up to be! Your mother would be so proud of you. Please continue to be a good girl, and listen to nanny.

Sincerely,

Mr. Barrow


	6. Chapter 6

16 December, 1925

Dearest Thomas,

I’m sure you remember that the servants at Downton have their Christmas celebration at luncheon, and the family have theirs at dinner. Of course I do not know what your routine is in your new place, but we would love to spend our Christmas lunch with you, if it is at all convenient. If I do not hear otherwise from you, then Mr. Molesley and I will be there at noon. Don’t worry about having anything fancy—we only wish to see you.

Fondly,

P _._

***

19 December, 1925

Phyllis,

I received your letter this morning, and thank you very much for inviting yourself for Christmas luncheon. Wish I would have thought of it myself. Truly though, it makes me happy to think I shall have some company on the holiday, and happier still to think it will be you. I even find myself happy to put up with old Molesley. I mean Mr. Molesley. Sorry. Sort of.

I shall have tea—and nothing fancy, as requested—ready when you arrive at noon. See you next week,

Thomas

***

26 December, 1925

Dear Mrs. Hughes,

Well, it’s official. Though the world may crumble, Lady Stiles has decided that the cook can bring up the tea for an evening, just this once, so I can attend Lady Edith’s wedding. Part of me wishes I could be a fly on the wall to watch it happen. But most of me just wants to see all of you again.

Thank you for giving me a room the night of the wedding. Oddly enough, I’m looking forward to sleeping in those old attics again. And I don’t mind being in my old room. I always liked the view from my window up there.

I was so grateful to all of you for coming here to see me for Christmas. It was the best surprise I’ve had in a long time. Who knows what the new year will have to offer? I always liked New Years—the chance at a new start and all that. And this one I’ll look forward to especially, with a new spirit.

Well, enough poetry, then. I must dash off, as I’ve plenty to do. Don’t let Lord and Lady Grantham keep you too busy with the wedding coming on, and so soon after Christmas. I’m looking forward to seeing you very soon,

Thomas

***

1 January, 1926

Dear Sir Mark,

It is with some regret that I inform you that I will no longer be able to continue in service as your butler, effective the 15th of January. I have been offered the position of butler at Downton Abbey, which you will know is the home of the Earl and Countess of Grantham, and also the place I have long considered my home.

I want you to know that I have enjoyed my time in your service, and I am grateful for the experience. I thank you especially for allowing me the privilege of walking your lovely gardens whenever I wished. You have a beautiful and peaceful estate, and I will remember it fondly.

I will of course begin searching for a replacement for myself immediately.

Yours sincerely,

Thomas Barrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If Phyllis' letter inviting herself to Christmas doesn't seem to fit perfectly, it's because it's from a story I wrote last December. I included it here because I like one cohesive head canon...


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank all of you for reading this story, and for your kudos, and your kind and encouraging comments. I honestly considered never posting this one, because I thought you might all think it was boring. Apparently I was wrong! It has been so lovely to know that this is worth reading. This has been the brightest spot in my life during a difficult time. Thank you so much to all of you. I hope you enjoy the concluding chapter!

2 January, 1926

Dear Mr. Barrow,

I write to you today to wish you a very happy new year, and to address some things that I now feel should have been said when we last spoke at Lady Edith’s wedding reception.

Firstly, I would like to apologize for my outburst over the champagne, and thank you for saving me from further embarrassment by offering so quickly to pour in my stead. I acted ungraciously, and in front of the family, and I am ashamed of my behavior. I was too proud in that moment—as is often my fault—to thank you properly for the assistance you provided.

Furthermore, it is with deep regret that I now see that my apologizing to you and thanking you regarding this small matter only make clear how much more of both I owe you. I hope you will now allow me to express both the appreciation and the sorrow I feel.

I thank you very much, Mr. Barrow, for your many years of service to the Crawley family, to this house, and also to me. You were an excellent footman, a competent valet, and an impeccable under-butler. This house would not be what it is today without your service, and I hope you know how very grateful I am to you.

Please also know—though I am terribly late in saying it—how deeply sorry I am for what you experienced last year. I am shamefully aware of how my treatment of you led you to believe that you were not wanted or needed among our staff. For this I give you my sincerest apology. You were an invaluable member of our family downstairs, and whether you were with us for fifteen minutes or fifteen years, you should never have been made to feel this way. Please believe me when I tell you how sorry I am for my part in this.

Finally, I wish to apologize for simply not offering you the position of butler sooner than I did. Whether or not I am able to continue on in this position—and sadly you and I both know that I am not—I now see that the position should have been yours many months ago, regardless of my health. You have proven time and again your ability to run this house as it should be run, and despite the fact that I prevented you from attaining it, I wish you to know that I have full trust in your abilities. It is time for me to move on, and I do so with complete confidence in you, my successor.

In short, Mr. Barrow, I wish you to know how very, very proud I am of you, and all that you have learned and achieved. I am proud to say that I trained you, but more importantly I am proud of the man you are. You are generous, brave, intelligent, and thoughtful. You are flawless in your work, and though I humbly accept that I taught you many of the skills you now possess, I wish to impress upon you that your achievement of the role of butler in a house as fine as Downton Abbey is yours and yours alone. Well done, Mr. Barrow. As I said, I am so very proud of you.

I look forward to seeing you in a fortnight, and to assisting you in any way I can in settling into your place here. Though I admit it pains me to leave my life’s work, I firmly believe there is no one I would rather leave it to, than you.

Yours very sincerely,

Charles Carson

***

14 January, 1926

Dear Mr. Carson,

I have read your letter countless times every day in the last week or more, and until now I could not find the words I needed to respond. I suppose I thought I was waiting until I could read your words without being reduced to tears, but it seems that day will never come.

All I can say is thank you. Thank you for your unmitigated praise, for your apology, and most importantly, for your forgiveness. Though you did not say it explicitly in your letter, I can see very well that you have forgiven me for every wrong I have done in my time at Downton, and your forgiveness means more to me than I can say. I had thought the slate was clean when I moved to my new position; today I know that it is truly clean only now—and only because of the acceptance and friendship extended to me by you and everyone else in the house. Now is the right time for me to be the butler of Downton Abbey, and not many months ago, as you said. I would not have been ready before, as I now see I needed to leave for a while to truly appreciate how much all of you mean to me. The letters you all have written to me in my time away are my most prized possession, and I will cherish them always.

I cannot believe how blessed I am to be returning home to all of you tomorrow. I never thought I would have the opportunity to truly make it up with all of you, and to be a part of this family again. I know I must thank his Lordship and Lady Mary for extending the opportunity to me, and I will. But please know that I thank you most of all—for everything you have taught me, for everything I am sure to learn from you in future, and for the trust you have placed in me as your successor. Thank you, Mr. Carson. I’ll be home soon.

Sincerely yours,

Thomas Barrow

 

 


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